Epcot Prepares for New Wave of Guests:
The Food and Wine Festival at Epcot kicks off on August 30th. Disney has begun moving in FEMA trailers in preparation for the large crowds expected during the park’s festival season.
Over the years, the Food and Wine Festival has grown exponentially in popularity. Epcot sees its capacity reached early in the day as guests seek refuge inside the park to sample food and beverages from around the world. The park gets so overloaded that families often get separated and routes get gridlocked for days. Some guests have even gone missing and in a few instances, died. To help alleviate this, FEMA trailers are being brought in for the first time ever to help ease the crowds.
“We looked at our crowd control data from last year’s festival and we definitely saw room for improvement,” said Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III. Geronimo is Vice President of Epcot’s Crowd Control Division. “We noticed a lot of people standing around which made it difficult for people passing through to find their way.”
Geronimo said the FEMA trailers are being added so that people have a place to sit down or pass out from the lethal combination of massive alcohol consumption and the Florida heat.
“People will wait in line for hours for a sip of shitty beer or taste some nasty ass food from India,” Geronimo continued. “When they finally get their samples, they just stand there blocking the path from guests who are trying to pass. It’s super-fucking annoying.”
Modern Luxuries Inside a FEMA Trailer:
The FEMA trailers at Epcot won’t be like the ones you remember after Hurricane Katrina. They will be air-conditioned with ample seating, a private bathroom, and a Sega Genesis. Disney does not expect these FEMA trailers to elicit tears of sadness, but no guarantees will be made. Wi-Fi can be also added to your trailer for $49.99 a day.
“Guest comfort is important to us,” concluded Geronimo. “Keeping guest traffic flowing is more importanter though.”
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