The newly installed Donald Trump Audio Animatronic at has skipped out on another performance at the iconic Hall of Presidents show at Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom. Our sources revealed to us that Robotrump™ (pronounced “Robot-Rump” and not “Robo-Trump”) has been spotted at Disney’s Magnolia Golf Course several times throughout the day, when he was scheduled to be performing at the Hall of Presidents.
According to our sources, the former presidents that make up Robotrump™’s cast mates are furious with the Audio Animatronic that bears the likeness of the current President of the United States.
“This is completely unprofessional,” President Nixon told us. “And I’m Richard fucking Nixon, so that’s saying something.”
It is a time-honored tradition for former presidents to live out their remaining years performing a live 23-minute show throughout the day, every day, forever, infinitely, at the Hall of Presidents for guests visiting the park from around the world.
“Of course we’d love to be doing other things [other than performing],” chimed in President Taft. “It’s bad enough that I’m forced to work their with the pleasing aroma that emanates from the Liberty Tree Tavern so close by, but you don’t see me bailing on the guests. They need us. Somehow Robotrump™ gets a free pass [to leave]. I don’t get it.”
This is not the first time Robotrump™ has caused controversy at the Hall of Presidents. When the attraction first debuted starring the current president, much of the cast reported he rubbed them the wrong way by talking loudly over the other presidents and making outlandish statements that only those with a mind of a child would possibly believe.
“It’s no secret [Robotrump™] has created a lot of tension backstage,” said Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III, a talent agent that represents many of the former presidents. “I think there’s a lot of people who want to drain his hydraulic fluid and repurpose what’s left for the upcoming Guardians of the Galaxy attraction.”
Much of the tension has to do with the frequency at which Robotrump™ has missed his performances. Typhoid Lagoon’s Fact Checker™ indicates that to date, he performed at the Hall of Presidents a meager 36 times out of a possible 405 showings since his Animatronic debuted on December 20, 2017.
“All he’s been doing is golfing,” concluded Geronimo. “He has taken more days off from the Hall of Presidents than the rest of the cast… COMBINED. If the situation does not improve, the cast has indicated to me that they are walking out if he takes one more vacation to Magnolia.”
When reached for comment, The Walt Disney Company issued the following statement:
“Due to the nature of the President-Actors Guild contract, we are unable to discuss the individual performers associated with The Hall of Presidents. However our door is always open to those presidents who wish to file any complaints or grievances. Have a Magical day.”