Top 10 Places to Break Up at Walt Disney World

You think a trip to Disney World is going to save your relationship but you are dead wrong. If anything, this vacation of yours has intensified your hate for one another. With this in mind, we present to you the top 10 places to break up throughout Walt Disney World, courtesy of Typhoid Lagoon’s Senior Relationship Expert, Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III. 10 – Space Mountain As you are screaming and hollering throughout the rapid descents and twisting turns, proclaim to your (former) lover that it’s over. It will be dark so they won’t be able to find your face to… Continue reading this fake story…

Trump Animatronic Skips Another Hall of Presidents Show

The newly installed Donald Trump Audio Animatronic at has skipped out on another performance at the iconic Hall of Presidents show at Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom. Our sources revealed to us that Robotrump™ (pronounced “Robot-Rump” and not “Robo-Trump”) has been spotted at Disney’s Magnolia Golf Course several times throughout the day, when he was scheduled to be performing at the Hall of Presidents. According to our sources, the former presidents that make up Robotrump™’s cast mates are furious with the Audio Animatronic that bears the likeness of the current President of the United States. “This is completely unprofessional,” President… Continue reading this fake story…

Donald Trump Animatronic Too Large For Structure

With the outcome of the 2016 Presidential Campaign behind us, Disney Imagineers are now focused on creating the Donald Trump Audio Animatronic to add to the Hall of Presidents attraction. Sources are informing us that it appears as though they have already run into trouble. “Well, in order to get the Donald Trump Animatronic as authentic as possible, I think we’re going to have to gut the whole building and reinforce the structure that supports all of the presidents,” Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III, the Structural Engineer for the Hall of Presidents tells us. “The weight of the figure is at… Continue reading this fake story…

Former Presidents on the Verge of Mutiny

Some of the former Presidents inside the Hall of Presidents attraction are on the verge of mutiny, according to an anonymous source with knowledge of the situation. Their complaints stem from this year’s Presidential Election and whom they may be working alongside once our new Commander in Chief is elected. “I think all of my fellow Commanders can agree that this election sucks,” Franklin D. Roosevelt, our nation’s 32nd President said. “If Trump gets elected, I will walk out of the Hall of Presidents and discontinue performing there. I’m not the only one either. If FDR walks, others will follow.… Continue reading this fake story…