Rickshaw Service to Connect Epcot to Hollywood Studios

Typhoid Lagoon spies have recently uncovered permits filed by Reedy Creek Improvement District to start a new transportation service between the parks. The files indicate that rickshaws are being strongly considered to shuttle guests from park to park.

Rickshaws (alternatively known as “ricksha” and “rikisha” in other parts of the world) are human-powered carts that have a maximum capacity of two people – or one … Continue reading this fake story…

Spaceship Earth to be Remade as Ball from Indiana Jones Movie

The famous rolling ball that almost flattened Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark will soon be part of the makeover for the iconic Spaceship Earth attraction at Epcot. This comes in response to the backlash over projecting an image of the Death Star from the Star Wars films onto the beloved attraction.

“We were shocked by the reaction of some … Continue reading this fake story…

Candidates Battle for Disney World’s Electoral Votes

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The 2016 Presidential Candidates are making their final desperate stops at Walt Disney World today in an attempt to sway any undecided voters. Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, Gary Johnson, and Jill Stein will be campaigning throughout the resort.

Secretary Hillary Clinton will be campaigning outside the Rock ’n’ Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror area of Disney’s Hollywood Studios between 2pm and 4pm.

Donald Trump will … Continue reading this fake story…

Mike Tyson Next to Narrate Spaceship Earth

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Epcot officials announced today that the next celebrity voice to narrate the Spaceship Earth attraction will be Mike Tyson. The former professional boxer beat out a long line of celebrities vying for the job including Rosanne Barr, Brendan Fraser, Fran Drescher, and Brock Lesner.

“We are very excited to have Mr. Mike Tyson be our next narrator,” said Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III, Vice President of Epcot’s … Continue reading this fake story…

All Fireworks Shows Moving to Pre-Dawn Hours

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The Walt Disney Company announced that starting in 2017, all fireworks shows will take place in the pre-dawn hours, instead of the evenings. This includes the popular Illuminations at Epcot as well as the Wishes fireworks show at the Magic Kingdom. The move comes as Disney looks for new and innovative ways to dazzle park guests around the clock.

“We’ve always thought of our evening fireworks … Continue reading this fake story…