Disney Raises Bid for Fox to $65,000,000,100

Deal Would Include FastPass+ For Life For Flight of Passage Ride Disney raised their original bid to purchase Fox yesterday. They countered Comcast’s bid of $65 billion with a new bid of $65-billion-one-hundred. This effectively raised the top bid by one-hundred dollars. Further sweetening the bid was a promise to give away Flight of Passage FastPass+ reservations for life. The popular thrill ride is located in the new Pandora area of Disney’s Animal Kingdom. The extra $100 being offered is a symbolic gesture meant to highlight the prestige of those unlimited FastPass+ reservations. “I wouldn’t gloss over that hundred bucks,”… Continue reading this fake story…

Grand Floridian Adding Exclusive Third Monorail Line

Third Monorail Line Would Connect Magic Kingdom to Grand Floridian It was announced today that a third monorail track will be added to the Magic Kingdom Resort loop. The new line will connect only the Magic Kingdom and Grand Floridian. A lone monorail train will make the trek back and forth between the two stops. This track will serve only those guests staying at the Grand Floridian who are otherwise too precious to wait through three other stops before they arrive at their resort. Currently, guests staying at the Grand Floridian Resort & Spa must first stop at Disney’s Contemporary… Continue reading this fake story…

One of a Kind Experience: Glamping in Dino-Rama

One Lucky Guest Will Win A Chance to go “Glamping” in Dino-Rama Last week, Disney announced that one lucky sweepstakes winner will get to spend the night camping in Pandora at Disney’s Animal Kingdom. Fresh off the heels of that announcement, the next “glamping” adventure to take place after that contest concludes was unveiled today. One lucky winner and up to four other guests will get to spend the night in Chester and Hester’s Dino-Rama at Disney’s Animal Kingdom. Glamping is a blending of the words “glamour” and “camping” and describes a style of camping that combines nature with modern… Continue reading this fake story…

Candidates Battle for Disney World’s Electoral Votes

The 2016 Presidential Candidates are making their final desperate stops at Walt Disney World today in an attempt to sway any undecided voters. Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, Gary Johnson, and Jill Stein will be campaigning throughout the resort. Secretary Hillary Clinton will be campaigning outside the Rock ’n’ Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror area of Disney’s Hollywood Studios between 2pm and 4pm. Donald Trump will be campaigning inside the it’s a small world attraction at the Magic Kingdom from 1pm – 3pm. Jill Stein will be campaigning inside the Avatar area of the park that is still… Continue reading this fake story…

DINOSAUR Closure Blamed on Salary Dispute

Fans of the DINOSAUR attraction at Disney’s Animal Kingdom were shocked this week by the news that the ride’s scheduled refurbishment has been delayed “indefinitely.” Our sources are reporting that this is due to a salary dispute involving the Iguanodon and the Carnotaurus. The DINOSAUR attraction features a Time Rover -led tour to the late Cretaceous Period in hopes of bringing back a live Iguanodon for research purposes. The seemingly routine trip is made more difficult by constant run-ins with the deadly Carnotaurus, a dinosaur that dwarfs the well-known T-Rex in size. DINOSAUR closed in July for routine maintenance that… Continue reading this fake story…