Rickshaw Service to Connect Epcot to Hollywood Studios

Typhoid Lagoon spies have recently uncovered permits filed by Reedy Creek Improvement District to start a new transportation service between the parks. The files indicate that rickshaws are being strongly considered to shuttle guests from park to park.

Rickshaws (alternatively known as “ricksha” and “rikisha” in other parts of the world) are human-powered carts that have a maximum capacity of two people – or one … Continue reading this fake story…

Man Becomes Ill Due to “Lack of Magic”

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A tourist visiting Walt Disney World last week fell ill just before he was scheduled to return to his home outside of Houston, Texas. The doctors diagnosed him with what medical professionals are calling a “Magic Deficiency” which is caused by suddenly being deprived of Magic.

The story starts when Hans Jameson flew to Orlando for his annual Walt Disney World vacation. For eight days, he was surrounded … Continue reading this fake story…

PizzeRizzo Granted Special License From Health Inspector

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Hollywood Studios’ new quick service pizza restaurant PizzeRizzo is set to open later this week in place of the old Pizza Planet. Our sources have indicated to us that the health inspector granted the restaurant a special license to allow rats to do most of the food preparation for the guests.

PizzeRizzo is named after the famous Muppet rat Rizzo, and will feature many of his signature pizzas … Continue reading this fake story…

Candidates Battle for Disney World’s Electoral Votes

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The 2016 Presidential Candidates are making their final desperate stops at Walt Disney World today in an attempt to sway any undecided voters. Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, Gary Johnson, and Jill Stein will be campaigning throughout the resort.

Secretary Hillary Clinton will be campaigning outside the Rock ’n’ Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror area of Disney’s Hollywood Studios between 2pm and 4pm.

Donald Trump will … Continue reading this fake story…

Parks to Start Selling Firearms to Guests

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This week, avid theme park fans were shocked when two separate guests at two separate parks were arrested following the discovery of loaded firearms in the possession of a guest at the Walt Disney World Resort. Disney has responded to these incidents by saying they will start selling firearms inside the parks starting next year, so that guests don’t have to go through the trouble of bringing … Continue reading this fake story…