Man Becomes Ill Due to “Lack of Magic”

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A tourist visiting Walt Disney World last week fell ill just before he was scheduled to return to his home outside of Houston, Texas. The doctors diagnosed him with what medical professionals are calling a “Magic Deficiency” which is caused by suddenly being deprived of Magic.

The story starts when Hans Jameson flew to Orlando for his annual Walt Disney World vacation. For eight days, he was surrounded … Continue reading this fake story…

Candidates Battle for Disney World’s Electoral Votes

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The 2016 Presidential Candidates are making their final desperate stops at Walt Disney World today in an attempt to sway any undecided voters. Presidential nominees Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, Gary Johnson, and Jill Stein will be campaigning throughout the resort.

Secretary Hillary Clinton will be campaigning outside the Rock ’n’ Roller Coaster and Tower of Terror area of Disney’s Hollywood Studios between 2pm and 4pm.

Donald Trump will … Continue reading this fake story…

Parks to Start Selling Firearms to Guests

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This week, avid theme park fans were shocked when two separate guests at two separate parks were arrested following the discovery of loaded firearms in the possession of a guest at the Walt Disney World Resort. Disney has responded to these incidents by saying they will start selling firearms inside the parks starting next year, so that guests don’t have to go through the trouble of bringing … Continue reading this fake story…

All Fireworks Shows Moving to Pre-Dawn Hours

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The Walt Disney Company announced that starting in 2017, all fireworks shows will take place in the pre-dawn hours, instead of the evenings. This includes the popular Illuminations at Epcot as well as the Wishes fireworks show at the Magic Kingdom. The move comes as Disney looks for new and innovative ways to dazzle park guests around the clock.

“We’ve always thought of our evening fireworks … Continue reading this fake story…

DINOSAUR Closure Blamed on Salary Dispute

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Fans of the DINOSAUR attraction at Disney’s Animal Kingdom were shocked this week by the news that the ride’s scheduled refurbishment has been delayed “indefinitely.” Our sources are reporting that this is due to a salary dispute involving the Iguanodon and the Carnotaurus.

The DINOSAUR attraction features a Time Rover -led tour to the late Cretaceous Period in hopes of bringing back a live … Continue reading this fake story…