Living With The Land Experiences COLOSSAL 15-Minute Wait!

In a sign that the busy summer season at Walt Disney World is in full swing, our network of spies have informed us that the Living with the Land attraction in Epcot experienced a rare 15-minute stand-by wait yesterday. “We’re still running the numbers but first reports are indicating that these wait times are accurate,” said Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III, Vice President of Disney World’s Ride Capacity Data and Analysis Division. “We haven’t seen anything like this since Horizons was closed and Test Track was still being built… or I guess, now that I think about it… last summer at… Continue reading this fake story…

Alden Ehrenreich and Harrison Ford to Star in Freaky Friday Reboot

Freaky Friday is about to get its third reboot. This time, the film will star both of the actors who played Han Solo in Star Wars: a relatively unknown actor named Harrison Ford and of course, screen legend Alden Ehrenreich. The plot will loosely follow the original Freaky Fridays, were an teen with extreme angst (Ford) will accidentally switch places with his father (Ehrenreich) as they navigate what life is like in the other’s shoes. “We’re very receptive to what the movie-going public wants,” said Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III, Vice President of Walt Disney Pictures’ Reboot Division. “More reboots. Our… Continue reading this fake story…

Top 10 Places to Break Up at Walt Disney World

You think a trip to Disney World is going to save your relationship but you are dead wrong. If anything, this vacation of yours has intensified your hate for one another. With this in mind, we present to you the top 10 places to break up throughout Walt Disney World, courtesy of Typhoid Lagoon’s Senior Relationship Expert, Thomas Jefferson Geronimo III. 10 – Space Mountain As you are screaming and hollering throughout the rapid descents and twisting turns, proclaim to your (former) lover that it’s over. It will be dark so they won’t be able to find your face to… Continue reading this fake story…

Epcot to Add North Korea to World Showcase

Our spies have uncovered permits detailing the addition of North Korea to Epcot’s World Showcase lineup. The last time World Showcase received a new country came way back in 1988 when Norway was added. Since then, several additions have been rumored and even announced but for one reason or another, all of those plans fell through. It appears as though that is all about to change. Hoping to capitalize on the public’s increased awareness of North Korea as of late, Disney hopes park guests will arrive in masses to visit this completely immersive experience. When we reached out to Disney… Continue reading this fake story…

Coming Soon: All Parade Floats To Be Set Ablaze

Late last week theme park guests visiting Magic Kingdom Park looked on in horror as the parade float depicting the beloved Maleficent dragon from Sleeping Beauty caught fire during the Festival of Fantasy parade. Luckily, no one was injured and the blaze was quickly extinguished. Or was it? Out of the ashes of the damaged parade float came a wonderful idea: set all parade floats on fire. “Guest Services was flooded with comments following the Maleficent dragon going up in flames,” said Sandy Richards, Vice President of Guest Relations. “They wanted to know when they could see more parade floats… Continue reading this fake story…